Bully Free Zone: Let’s Start the Discussion

While bullying isn’t new, in recent years it has come into the forefront in schools across our county. The news depicts plenty of escalating bullying behaviors that have tragically ended in school shootings or suicide. Between 15-25% of U.S. students report that they experience bullying with some frequency, and surprisingly 15-20% of students report that they engage in bullying others (see stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov). As a principal, I take bullying very seriously and a few years back adopted a school wide Bully Free Zone policy. Bullying hurts both the person who is allowed to bully and his/her victims. It is as insidious as gossip and is often difficult to control if allowed to go unchallenged for an extended period of time. If bullying is to stop at schools, it has to start with a serious commitment on the part of school officials, teachers and students. First, students need a clear understanding of exactly what bullying is: repeated physical acts that hurt, spreading rumors, being exclusive (cliques), mean, or “gang-type” activities. While some bullying is overt and easily detected, it seems the subtler bullying can almost be more hurtful as it is easy to miss, and its constant pecking away at a young person’s soul can take a serious toil.

We start our school year by openly and honestly discussing/defining bullying. Just opening up and actually saying the word “bullying” in front of students has allowed many important discussions to begin. Once we have determined our definition, we then talk about what we are going to do about it: what behaviors we will accept as a student body, and what behaviors we will not. It is mind-boggling how quickly even the youngest children are able to clarify right from wrong. They know what behaviors/words scare them and they are just waiting for the adults to step up and help set the rules: AND stick with them. Schools need to play hardball against bullying. I then ask every teacher and student to take a pledge against bullies: if you want to be a bully, you will have to go to school somewhere else. No bullies allowed. Period. You can hear a clear collective sigh of relief in our school auditorium. Our school is different. Everyone is safe. It is amazing what children can do when they feel safe.

Next steps? Concrete ideas? Hang on until next week, as this post is the start of a series. Next week I will explore what you can do as a parent. If you have a question, I would love to answer!